Spring Break

 

This is K and I at Carver Lake Park today.  We had such fun.  The sun was bright.  Hence my squinty eyes.  LOL   It’s been a challenge since she has been up here.  Testing limits, testing if I really lover her still, wondering if I am sincere to my word, etc.  She has had a couple meltdowns but they haven’t lasted nearly as long as they have in the past.  I know she is struggling with being away from me.  I struggle with being away from her.  But, I told her today, we have 3 weeks together now.  We gotta get this figured out.  And if you are planning on coming back home with me, things need to change.  I think she finally realizes that she does have choices and her choices make a reaction from mom and grandma.  She sees that her negative choices lead to negative consequences.  I think she realizes that when she does what she needs to do and that, she is more apt to get to do the things she really wants to do.  I hope while we have our 3 weeks together that she and I can re-bond and also get some stuff set up so that she and grandma don’t have to butt heads all the time.

Going back to Mayo Clinic tomorrow to get a shot in my knee.  I am not sure what it is called, but I am praying and hoping that it helps longer than regular cortisone.  I will let ya know.

I have been so tired lately.  It’s like my butt is draggin.  I have been moving around more, exercising, walking.  I thought it was supposed to rev up my metabolism…..not make me so darn tired all the time.  I don’t know.  Still going to go to the Y tomorrow.  Need to workout a bit and then swim with K for awhile in the afternoon.  I know it’s all good for me.  Gotta get rid of the “saddlebags” on my hips/thighs.  I also want to improve my strength.  So lift a few weights.  I will keep praying and hoping all this stuff I am doing will pay off for me.  I know that one other thing is that I need to get an eating plan set up.  I need to stick by it and keep doing it.

My other concern lately is my spirituality.  Being or becoming centered.  I can’t quite seem to get to my peaceful self again.  I know I can do it…have done it before many times.  I talked with Adam again this last week.  We talked about what I want to do.  Where I want to be.  I talked to him about that I talked with Northwestern University in St. Paul. (I think that is what it was).  Major in psychology.  But yet, that isn’t exactly what I want to do.  I want to work with people.  I want to be with people.  I want to share what I have learned and what I know.  I know I have the tools and personal experience that may be helpful for others.  I have shared some things with friends going through stuff….I know it works.  Then I think about possibly doing healing touch and/or reiki.  I really want to do massage therapy but with the lupus and arthritis, I don’t think my joints and stuff in my hands could handle that as a job everyday.  I think I will be talking with Adam more about this next week.  I am glad that I have gone back to work with him for therapy.  I think that he can really help me.

Mom and Tiny leave for Texas this Wednesday.  The will be gone until nearly Easter.  I have no clue what I am going to do while down at her house while K is in school.  Take my computer and stuff.  Find some good reads.  Something.  Will have to think on that a bit more this week.

Have a great week.

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